How to Start Conversations About Mental Health: 8 Practical Tips

by Suzie Booth, Psychotherapist/Counsellor, MSc. MBACP (accred).

We've spoken about mental health stigma and what we can do about it. Talking about mental health can feel daunting. Whether it’s asking someone else how they’re really doing or sharing how you are, many of us hesitate. We worry about saying the wrong thing, about making it worse, or about finding the 'perfect' moment.

The truth is, there’s no perfect time. But there are gentle, practical ways to make these conversations easier, and more meaningful...

1. Don’t wait for the perfect moment

That moment when you’re both in a great mood, with no distractions and nothing else on your minds? It doesn’t exist. If you wait for it, the conversation may never happen. Instead, talk in everyday spaces; in the car, on a walk, over coffee. The best time is often simply now.

2. Ask twice

We’ve all done it: someone asks “How are you?” and we reply, “Fine, thanks.” Asking again, “How are you really?” shows genuine care and creates space for a more honest response.

3. Resist the urge to fix

It’s natural to want to take away someone’s pain, but rushing in with solutions can leave them feeling dismissed. Often, the most powerful gift you can give is your presence. Sit with them, listen well, and let them know you can bear their discomfort without needing to erase it.

4. Keep the conversation going

If they pause, don’t immediately move on. Encourage them gently with phrases like, “Tell me more,” or “I’m listening.” Use nods, eye contact, and open body language to show you’re engaged.

5. Acknowledge the elephant in the room

If someone has been struggling, be direct. Avoiding the topic can feel like ignoring their reality. Instead, ask how they’re doing now, or how they’re coping since a particular event. If they’ve lost someone, don’t be afraid to mention the person’s name. This shows you care, and it validates their experience.

6. Do a little research

If you know they’re facing something like anxiety or depression, explore what support is available. GP services, helplines, online forums, and mental health charities can all be valuable. Showing that you’ve taken time to learn and gather resources helps lighten the burden on them.

7. Remember, it doesn’t have to be face-to-face

Not everyone feels comfortable opening up in person. Text, WhatsApp, email, or phone calls all count. The same principles, listening, patience, care, still apply, no matter the format.

8. Be patient

You can’t force someone to talk before they’re ready. But by checking-in, asking with care, and showing up consistently, you let them know the door is always open. Sometimes, that reassurance is the first step toward them reaching out when they’re ready.

Conversations about mental health don’t have to be perfect, they just need to be real. By asking with genuine care, listening without fixing, and showing up with patience, you can make it easier for someone to feel seen and supported.